Could you tell me a time you worried about the future?

Throughout my childhood and the first few years since leaving school I had no worries. I remember the feeling of boundless possibility open in front of me - I could do anything I wanted to do. I had a lot of good friends and a supportive family that would help me do whatever I wanted to. I don’t believe this was in an arrogant or an overly self-confident way but rather a youthful optimism, ready to take on whatever came my way. 

I do still have good friends and a supportive family yet I worry about the future. It is not a constant worry but rather an intermittent nagging of what am I doing with my life, where am I going, who do I want to be? 

A lot of my anxiety stems from comparing myself to others. Whatever I find myself doing, be it as a professional sportsman, be it studying for a degree, be it simply scrolling through social media, I am constantly comparing myself to those around me. This leads at times to a sense of inferiority, a sense helplessness and a desire to be elsewhere in life. Having been a youngster with a lot of aspiration, the reality of ‘real life’ hits hard.

This leads to me worrying about the future and all that comes with it. I find myself stressing about things that are largely speaking out with my control and I find it hard to always be present and fully apply myself to small tasks in the here and now. I frequently change my mind about what I want to do with my life and this leads to an anxiety about whether what I’m doing right now is the ‘right’ thing to be doing. It is also very easy to look back on prior life decisions and feel frustrated about taking one option and not another!

All of these problems are completely human and will touch just about anyone I can think of - it is a source of strength to speak to people about your worries and this should not be shied away from (especially when such worries seem relatively trivial). Writing this, I do feel very fortunate for what I have and I want to try to return to being enthusiastic about everything around me. I think that if we value what we have in the present moment it is much easier to let the future take care of itself. This moment in time (lockdown) is a great opportunity to reflect on the things we value and let that help guide the direction in which we are going to travel. We are a short time on this planet and any time spent worrying about what is to come is time wasted.