Could you tell me a time you needed time?

A time I needed time was the 31st of January 2020. That day started when I jumped into an Uber at eight in the morning with my head feeling the size of a balloon, a headache that could break through mountains and my mouth as dry as Tesco own brand rich teas. 

I got to my course and did a day of marketing and sales. By the end of the day my head was spinning with information in which I was going to go home and collect into notes on my computer. 

When I got to the bus stop however, my girlfriend messaged me to let me know she was just round the corner visiting friends at a social club. I decided to join them as I hadn't seen her all day and I wanted to say hello to her friends and wind down after a busy day of learning.

I was only 15 minutes in the premises when I got the phone call. The phone call I never wanted to ever receive. A phone call I'll always remember to my dying day.

On the other end of the phone was my best friends sister, I took the call in the hallway as it was unusual of her to make a phone call at such a time. It was my best friend’s sister who informed me that my best friend had passed away that morning. 

After the phone call, my head seemed as if it had turned into cotton wool, my legs gave way and I slid down the wall and to the floor, my head in my hands with only one thought. My best friend is dead. My best friend is gone. 

A flood of tears began to stream from my eyes, I started to cry hysterically, I was in a living nightmare that I will never wake from. 

The memories started playing like a movie tape in my mind, I started to hear his voice and his laugh then my girlfriend appeared in front of me. 

She asked "What's wrong?, what's happened?" As she trys to lift me from the floor and keep me standing upright. 

I just couldn't believe it. 

A time I needed a time was after my friend died. People were trying to support me and be there for me, tried to visit me and encourage me to go outside. But no. At that time, all I needed was time. Time to get my head straight, time to grieve the boy I grew up with, time to process how hard he tried to come off the drugs but...never quite made it. Time to think about my life and what would happen if I died tomorrow? What would I leave my girlfriend and what would I leave my family?. Time to cry into pillows and on my girlfriend's shoulder, time to drink and get so drunk to realise the next morning actually...this isn't helping. Time to heal. Time to remember. Time to celebrate those who's life had gone far too soon, but time for me to realise how fragile life is. Time to be grateful for who is in my life and time to take the time to say hello.